Don't look directly at it, you may turn to stone, or you may be left with scorched sockets where your eyes used to be.
Are you ready?
Are you sitting down?
Have you had any alcoholic beverages today? (that could give you a false sense of lack of fugliness?)
Side effects may include nausea, vomiting, dry mouth, dizziness, puckered va-jay, unwanted body hair, and a third arm sprouting from your back.
If you are nursing, pregnant, or plan to become pregnant, this photo is not for you.......
TAAA-DDAAAA!! Keep in mind, this is a professionally shot photo. A person who has made their career out of taking pictures snapped this, and Broom Hilda has pulled out all of the stops to try to make herself look as appealing as possible. You should see her fresh out of bed with three days worth of grease in her hair and plaque on her teeth. I wanted to get a closer one of it, but I was afraid of being busted. She has these hanging in the kennel right by the door, so I was in fear of her imminent arrival. I had a lookout, but still!!!
Good news! Actually, GREAT news! The plodding Princess of Plop is about to be fired! Hip Hip Hooray! I've been waiting three long years for this day to arrive. She has finally been caught stealing. I always knew she did, even though I never saw her do it and had no evidence of it happening, simply because that is the kind of person she is. DISHONEST. And thinking she's owed things. You know the type. She invited another employee over for dinner that I guess she thought she'd made good friends with, good enough to make comments like "Oh, you can just take one, no one will miss it....." There were also many items in her pit of despair that could've easily come from the clinic, and a few that could've ONLY come from the clinic. SO we have placed locks on all supply rooms and closets until the new guy starts next week, at which time the guy who does our drug tests/background searches, etc., will be coming in to escort the pile out of the clinic for GOOD!!!! It's just a shame to me that she's been there for so long, I mean, there have been plenty of reasons to give her the boot that don't involve thievery. Unless you're talking about stealing people's souls and smiles!!!!
This calls for a pot luck lunch! Minus the Slop Surprise!
Friday, February 20, 2009
Portrait of the Duchess of Droop
Posted by Jen at 3:07 PM
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2 comments:
Why would she hang a picture of herself in the kennel... that's just weird. She looks kinda like Jenny's old roomate except fat and brunette. Hopefull the guy they hired to replace her will be better. Don't you wish that people applying would have to work for a week and then the employees would vote on who got hired.... better people would get hired for sure.
She doesn't look that bad, but then, I know first-hand what photo shop can do for the hideous among us. We recently sold a pic of this guy with the most enormous carrot-nose hovering over his half-asleep newborn that's yellow and very dead looking. He actually purchased this, probably because my boss photoshopped it to death and it was the best shot Pinocchio ever sat for. Uh, I'm glad Princess Puke is leaving, but I wonder what you will blog about now?
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