Hooray For Tooth Decay

I know it's been awhile since you've heard anything about my favorite co-worker, Rotunda- Evil Queen of Doom And Destitution. Well here's a charming tale. Once upon a time, in a land not so far away, there lived an Evil Queen named Rotunda, and her faithful sidekick King Frontbutt III. King Frontbutt spent his days eating the finest cheeses and meats from vats made of solid gold, followed by dessert fit for royalty- Little Debbies and candy corns. One day, as he was chewing an especially tasty wad of steak fat, a shooting pain traveled from his tooth to his greasy scalp! He summoned the Queen, who determined upon closer inspection that his tooth was rotten and in need of immediate removal. She made haste to the vet clinic next door, where she borrowed the DENTAL INSTRUMENTS WE USE ON DOGS to extract the offending molar. After that they were able to eat, smoke, and stink to high heaven as they've always done, in their Crusty Castle on the hill. They lived heftily ever after. THE END
It's not like she ASKED if she could use them, it was all done on the sly. NOT that I'm concerned about pet germs in his mouth, I'm more concerned about HIS germs in pets' mouths. We sterilized them all of course. One person caught her in the act and she spilled her story, and inevitably we all knew by the end of the day. REALLY, it's vomitous. I mean, brush your teeth on occasion. I know it's hard to believe, but that buttery fuzz on them is not the enamel.
We had that pot luck lunch I mentioned in an earlier blog today, and she had signed up for cake. She was the only one signed up for dessert when I left Friday, so I brought regular food AND a dessert, because there was no way I was ingesting something that came out of that roach motel. Anyway, we were all discussing this towards the end of the day and I was like, "I decided to eat a piece." And they were like, "No you didn't." And I said, "Yeah I did, and his tooth was in it."